Patients Hate Them! Six Terrible Film and Television Doctors

The life of a medical student is stressful, and the path to a stellar career in medicine will have a few mistakes. On some days it can feel like you’ve done everything wrong and that you’re destined to be the worst doctor in the world…if you even make it that far. Before you throw in the towel, take a moment to put things in perspective. We’re often bombarded by film and television doctors who are portrayed as heroic geniuses whose personal failings somehow make them even better at their jobs, but the reality is that doctors are human beings too, and we can’t all be as beloved as Doctor Greene (ER) or as savant as Doctor House (House). So, when you’re feeling overwhelmed, instead of focusing on unobtainable media standards (we’re looking at you, Dr. Shephard), sit back and enjoy the follies of these terrible film and television doctors instead.

1. Animation: Dr. Zoidberg (Futurama)
Can you get any more incompetent than Dr. Zoidberg, the lovable crustacean who attends to the medical needs of the characters on Futurama? The crabby doctor, who can’t even tell the difference between humans and robots, has a dangerously incomplete understanding of human anatomy, and on more the one occasion in the show, his treatment approach has done more harm than good. Dr. Zoidberg’s incompetence with human patients is only rivaled by the rest of the crew’s inexplicable acceptance of his medical advice and serves as one of the running jokes/social commentaries for which the show is known. So, if you need a boost on a particularly bad day…why not Zoidberg?

2. Horror: Dr. Lecter (Silence of the Lambs)
Sometimes it can be difficult to know how best to help a patient without crossing ethical boundaries, but we're pretty sure eating your patients is pretty far over the line. Still, that's what makes the antihero of the 1991 thriller Silence of the Lambs (and the subsequent sequels and spinoffs) so mesmerizing. Hannibal Lecter exudes a terrifying magnetism that both fascinates and repulses. Silence of the Lambs won't calm your nerves after a particularly stressful day, but watching its characters wrestle with Lecter's skewed ethics might be a well-needed tonic when you're faced with tough questions.

3. Comedy: Dr. Rumack (Airplane!)
Medical students learn quickly that good practice isn't just knowing facts – you need to be perceptive and aware of what's going on around you, and your patients. Dr. Rumack, the hapless doctor helping to steer the floundering crew and passengers of the titular airplane, may just be one of the most clueless doctors in the history of film, but that's what makes Leslie Neilsen's performance so classic. Whether you've worked with an equally oblivious senior practitioner, or have had a moment of overconfident idiocy yourself, you'll understand that we all have times when we think we're in control, only to have reality come in and slap you in the face. Watch Airplane! when you need to break the tension with a good laugh.

4. Science Fiction: Dr. Zaius (Planet of the Apes)
For a film about monkeys, Planet of the Apes starts a pretty deep philosophical conversation about some of man's most troublesome tendencies. Dr. Zaius, the pious, intractable, villain of the original Planet of the Apes film, gives us a chance to look at our own prejudices from a new vantage point. Whether you're frustrated with a backward thinking colleague, struggling to convince administration to embrace a new approach, or simply wrestling with your own preconceptions, Dr. Zaius and the entire film serve as a warning against stubborn adherence to outdated world views.

5. Classic: Dr. Frankenstein (Frankenstein)
Frankenstein's 'monster' has become such a horror-story staple that we tend to forget that the creature is neither named Frankenstein nor is it the monster in the story. The true monster of Mary Shelley's original novel is, in fact, Doctor Victor Frankenstein whose ambition and pride destroy any chance of happiness, for him or his creation. And while most medical students don't spend their nights re-animating corpses, it can be tempting to assume that your new-found expertise in all things human makes you invincible. When hubris comes calling, prescribe yourself a dose of reality. Lucky for you, Frankenstein comes in various strengths and dosing methods, whether you want Kenneth Branagh flourishing capes, Gene Wilder cackling jokes, or a good old-fashioned monster film with Bella Lugosi.

6. Superheroes: Dr. Doom (The Fantastic Four)
In a way, Dr. Doom – whom Stan Lee called a “soul-stirring...super sensational...villain” – is a compilation of all of the typical foibles medical professionals struggle with on a day to day basis. Only in Doom, they're magnified to super-villain proportions. According to some Marvel mythologies, Doom's iconic mask covers not a hideous deformity, but rather a minuscule scar that consumes the perfectionist Doctor's psyche. Likewise, Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, who created the character, saw this perceived imperfection as a motivating factor to Doom's evil. In the field of medicine, unlike many other career paths, doctors deal literally with life and death situations, and it can be easy to become obsessed with being perfect. Of course, it's important to do everything in your power to make the right decisions, find the right solutions, and help your patients, but Dr. Doom is a reminder that our flaws, our mistakes, and our imperfections are what make us human.